Frank the flying firefighter flew fast to every fire. Frank flew fearlessly to fields of fire with never a frown on his face, unless it was foggy. When the firefighting was fought, Frank would stop for food. However Frank wasn’t a friend of healthy eating so instead he would feast on fried fast food. Fast food makes Frank fat, which made flying ferociously difficult. When Frank the flying fat firefighter wasn’t flying, he would be getting friendly with his four square dance group or his connect five Sequence group. Frank thought both were fun. He always had a fantastic time forming five dot sequences. On Friday, Frank picks up Fredalina in his Ferrari for a night of frights and fairies at the fair grounds haunted house. Because he can fly, Frank and Fredalina get in for free. Even though Fredalina is very flexible, Frank is very respectful of her and there will be no Frenching or mating. Fredalina is Frank’s biggest fan because he is so faithful to her. He brings her flowers and tells her she’s super fine (even though she thinks she could have a flatter fanny). Fredalina is fraught with fear that her flying boyfriend frank might one day have a fatal run in with a flock of foul. She fears he will quickly figure out that the laws of physics apply to even him as he is falling out of the sky the flat earth below. However Frank finds comfort in a fatal fall if it allows him to have a freaking awesome funeral like this
one. That would be fabulous. Frank doesn’t feel his final feat is soon though. Or maybe it is – Look! A flock of forty-five flamingos. In February? What a freak of nature! Flapping feathers finished Frank.
4 comments:
HAHAHA! That was a lot of fun to read.
I had a hard time reading it out loud and I have had an even harder time figuring out if Franks final flight was fate.
The only thing better than clicking on that link and going WAIT! I was AT that funeral! (and it may have been freaking awesome but let me tell you, it took a LONG time to get to the cemetery) was that "flatter fanny."
I stole that link off of some girl's website like three weeks ago and have just been waiting for a chance to link it somewhere any where. If you were at that funeral then it was likely you know the girl I stole it from.
Everyone I show that picture to agrees that it is freaking cool to have your casket taken in a horse drawn hearse.
I tried a story with S but all I could come up with was "Sarah and Samantha are siamese twins who swim in a syncranized swim routine for a south Somalia swim team." But then I couldn't go any further in my head and have since started writing a short story of a battle going on in Katie's body. If you can do anything with Sam and Sara feel free.
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