Monday, December 8, 2008

udder conversation

(While announcing the building washing machine isn't working)

Nessa - What's wrong with it?
me - It does spin any more. The center agitator works so the water and soap get mixed but the water doesn't get spun out.
Nessa - So that means the clothes are soaking?
Me - Yup. Last time I did a load of wash I had to hand wring every thing as it came out. My hands were so tired by the time I was done that it reminded me of milking cows as a kid.
Nessa - You've milked a cow?
Me - Yeah. As a cubscout.
Nessa - I don't think I could drink milk after milking a cow. I think it would be too real to know my hands just squirted out of the udders that milk.
Me - Is it the hand to udder ratio that does you in?
Nessa - Yeah - I think so.
Me - Well then you don't really have to worry now. The hand to udder ratio has dropped significantly now days. Now days the cows walk up to a machine and as the cow chews on hay, the farmer attaches sucking tubes to the udders. The hand to udder ratio is small. And as the cow eats, the udders get sucked on and then wrinkle up when they are done. I think that's when they know they are done is when the udder tips start wrinkling up.
Nessa - Sean, I think we should mark this as the day on the calender that I stopped drinking milk. this hand to udder to sucking cups to wrinkled udder tips is enough for me.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Does she know that your mother's family owned a ranch until you were in your mid-teens and you used to visit and work there several times a year?

She might give up eating altogether if she ever finds out some of the other things you and your brother did on the ranch. Like herding cattle, feeding cattle, butchering cattle, picking eggs, butchering chickens, catching and cleaning fish (at least watching since your grandfather seemed to be the one that actually did it).

BTW - the milk and cream on the ranch was always fresh from the cows.

Cindy said...

LOL--how old is Nessa?

When I was a kid (10-11) we had chickens. We collected eggs every day and occasionally my dad killed a chicken. Plucking chickens...not a favorite memory!

Sean said...

She's 33.